Last night I dreamed that I was weightless! I was like, 0mg
What do you get if you cross a maths teacher and a clock? Arithma-ticks!
What kind of tree could a maths teacher climb? = Geometry
I hit someone with a scientific calculator – I used the cosh button
After careful investigation, it was found that aliens’ heights were paranormally distributed
Have you heard about the mathematical plant? It has square roots
Hired an odd-job man to do 8 jobs for me. When I got back, he’d only done jobs 1,3,5, and 7
Two cats called ‘1,2,3’ & ‘un,deux,trois’ had swim race across channel.
1,2,3 cat won because un, deux, trois cat sank!
Talking sheepdog gets all the sheep in the pen for his farmer. He comes back and says ‘All 40 accounted for.’ Farmer says, ‘I’ve only got 36!’ Sheepdog replies, ‘I know, but I rounded them up.’
He said she was average because he was mean.